Rambling Along…

Prior to being a parent, I used to scoff at the thought of co-sleeping.

“Children need to learn to sleep in their own bed,” was the mantra running through my head, and I couldn’t fathom a child sleeping between parents, unless the child was sick or scared on those very occasional moments.

When Little Dude was born, we faced many sleepless hours as our son wasn’t about to sleep when put in a bed of any sort. And on his back - forget it. He would last an hour. So we broke all our rules and began some modified co-sleeping.

Those first few weeks, the Hubby and I sharing shifts on the couch or recliner in our living room, with Little Dude asleep on chests, while the off-duty parent would have a couple hours of sleep in bed, alone.

As a mom working outside the home, and finances being what they are and were, I returned to work two months after giving birth. Not a day I looked forward to, as despite my earlier beliefs that I would never desire to be a stay-at-home mom, I soon realized how much I didn’t want to miss a moment of his life.

I was determined to continue breastfeeding and pumping for Little Dude’s food supply, despite my schedule, and since Little Dude was a big night feeder, and still wasn’t sleeping all that well, I knew my sleep would be interrupted many times and I would no longer have the chance to catch a nap mid-day.

Our routine was soon established.

Little Dude would sleep in his bassinet (and later his crib) for a while (and man-oh-man was it a challenge to get him to sleep for any length of time!). I would put him back in either of his beds if he woke prior to midnight for a feeding. If the feeding was after midnight, Little Dude and I would find our way to the extra bedroom, where we would curl-up for the rest of the night, so he could nurse as needed, and I could catch some extra sleep.

It was cozy, and despite the many sleepless nights and the wishes I had for “just one solid night of sleep,” I loved our quiet, sleepy time spent together in those wee hours of the morning.

When he was diagnosed with the severe dairy-protein allergy (at six-months-old), some of this sleeplessness was explained. Eventually, after the allergy diagnosis, a diet switch for me, and a few nights of tears (Little Dude shed a few, too), Little Dude was sleeping through the night and would no longer curl-up so contentedly with us. He had learned to like his own space for sleeping.

We were sad, but at the same time we knew he was on the road to independence, the ultimate goal most parents wish for their children.

And then we went on vacation this year, and one of Little Dude’s old enemies came into view - a port-a-crib!

We tried several times to get Little Dude to go to sleep in the port-a-crib, and it did work. Once. He promptly woke screaming within a few hours.

After that, and the screaming we heard whenever we took him near the crib, we finally gave in. (Yes, I used to claim I wouldn’t be “that” parent either - giving-in to my strong-willed child. Silly mommy.) He slept between us for the rest of the trip.

We worried about how things would pan-out when we returned home, but happily, Little Dude saw his crib, pointed to it that night, and proclaimed, “night-night.”

This past week, we revisited co-sleeping, as Little Dude has been unable to sleep for any extended period of time, since the beginning of week, due to coughing.

After a night of absolutely no sleep, following several nights of very little sleep, Friday night saw Little Dude and I curled-up in the recliner in the living room - very much a flashback to those nights when we first brought him home.

Although it wasn’t a perfectly comfortable night for either of us, since Little Dude was frustrated, in his sleep, when he couldn’t stretch out the way he wanted - we had some tears, kicking and lots of squirming - and I was in an upright position to help keep him from coughing, it was somewhat wonderful to just be snuggled, with my baby, who is now a little boy, for a full night.

In good news, Little Dude is doing better - and more importantly, he is back to sleeping contentedly in his bed.

As for me, my stance on co-sleeping has been permanently altered by all we’ve experienced in the past almost two years. In fact, my hard-lined stance on how to parent has changed quite a bit. I’m a lot more open, and quick to tell people to “pick your battles carefully,” and that “there isn’t one right way to parent every child.”

That being said, I really am glad my child prefers his own bed. And after all the struggles we went through in the beginning, to get him to sleep peacefully, I think you can understand why I keep taking these pictures.

We’ve come so far. To see him sleep so peacefully now, is such a blessing.